


The Deal

by make_your_user_a_name



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Castiel Makes a Deal with The Shadow (Supernatural), Castiel Needs Dean Winchester, Castiel Needs Love (Supernatural), Castiel/Dean Winchester First Kiss, Castiel/Dean Winchester First Time Having Sex, Dean Winchester Needs a Hug, First Kiss, First Time, Hurt Castiel (Supernatural), Hurt/Comfort, Jack Kline Feels, M/M, No Smut, Sam Winchester Finds Out, Supportive Sam Winchester, Unhappy Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-18
Updated: 2020-08-18
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:40:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25980742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/make_your_user_a_name/pseuds/make_your_user_a_name
Summary: Dean wakes up happier than he's ever been. But the angel he'd fallen asleep next to last night isn't there. Frantically, he searches the bunker for him.
Relationships: Castiel/Dean Winchester
Comments: 6
Kudos: 122





	The Deal

Dean opened his eyes slowly, his entire body pressing into his mattress. He ran a hand over the bed next to him, his eyes still adjusting to the light, and he frowned. 

Where there should have been a warm body, there was nothing.

For a second, disappointment filled him. He must have dreamed the whole thing.

But as he sat up and saw the trenchcoat and suit scattered across the floor, he smiled softly. It was real. They were real. It had actually happened.

Then his mind went back to the empty bed next to him. Cas must have gone to the kitchen to make coffee.

 _In his underwear_? A voice whispered, and Dean chuckled softly at the image. No, Cas must have taken one of his t-shirts. Which was adorable. Dean felt the golden glow inside of him swell and he sat on his bed for another minute, letting waves of happiness roll over him. 

He slipped on an AC/DC t-shirt and some jeans, then left his room. 

The bunker was quiet, and his bare feet fell softly on the tile floor. The hallway lights were a soft yellow, and he looked up at them, smiling for no reason. When he got to the kitchen, he pushed open the door expecting to see Cas at the coffee maker, but he wasn’t there.

Dean frowned, and the happiness inside him started to fade a little.

He poured himself a cup of coffee--someone had already made it--and walked into the map room. Above him, he heard a door click and he looked to the top of the stairs. Sam walked through and nodded to him. 

“Did you make coffee?” Dean asked, sipping at his mug and silently wishing he’d added cream or sugar. 

“Yeah, before I went on a run.” 

Dean rolled his eyes. Of course he’d been on a run. “Oh.”

“How come?” 

His neck started to feel hot and he rubbed it self-consciously. “Nothing. You seen Cas?” 

Sam wiped sweat off his face and frowned. “No, he’s probably in his room.”

 _Why would he be in his room? Is he upset?_ Dean’s thoughts swirled around inside his head, terrified that what they’d done last night was somehow wrong, that Cas was hiding in his room. Then he looked away from Sam, who was still staring at him, and walked out of the room into the hallway. 

He knocked on the door, the sound hollow, and was greeted with silence. 

“Cas?” he called softly. 

When he got no answer, he started to knock a little harder. “Are you mad at me, man?”

Still nothing. He tried the door handle and found it unlocked, so he pushed into the room. 

The bed was made neatly, like it always was when Cas left the room. Besides that, the room was totally empty, showing no sign that anyone even lived there. 

The warm glow he’d felt that morning was all but gone. 

He searched the rest of the bunker, almost running. He checked rooms they’d never even used, checked inside all the cars in the garage, checked the dungeon. No Cas. Somehow, he ended back in his own room, folding Cas’ clothes gently. His eyes drifted upward to the wall next to his door, and he smiled, his mind drifting to the night before. 

_Cas came into his room without knocking, his trenchcoat hanging loosely at his sides and his hair sticking up at odd angles._

_“Hey, you okay, man?” Dean asked, standing up from his bed to walk over to the angel._

_“We can’t beat him.”_

_“What? Chuck? We will, Cas. We just need a little more time. We’re going to beat him. We got Jack’s soul back. That’s a win, right?” Cas looked so helpless that Dean walked over, gripping his shoulder tightly to steady him._

_“Yes,” Cas said quietly. He looked up at Dean, and his eyes were wet, shining brightly in the light cast by the lamp on his nightstand._

_“We got this.”_

_Cas just smiled sadly and looked at Dean. “You should know- I have to tell you…” Then he trailed off, looking down at their feet._

_Dean pulled him into a tight hug, feeling more brazen without Sam watching his every move. Cas rested his head on Dean’s shoulder, tentatively wrapping his arms around his waist. “I got you. Okay, Cas? We’re family.”_

_The angel snorted. “Family.”_

_Dean frowned and pulled back, keeping his arms around Cas but looking into his eyes. “I mean it, man. You’re family.”_

_This time Cas’ smile was bitter, so full of pain that Dean would do anything to get it off his face. “You’re more than family to me, Dean. So much more.” Cas untangled himself from Dean’s arms and moved for the door, but Dean’s hand stopped it from opening._

_“What are you talking about?”_

_“Nothing,” Cas said stubbornly, reaching up to move Dean’s hand and yank the door open._

_“Cas, wait. You can’t just say something like that and split. What the hell do you mean?”_

_Cas looked back at him and gulped, then he seemed to steel himself, his eyes growing hard and his chin lifting. “It means I’m in love with you, Dean Winchester.”_

_Dean couldn’t control the grin that spread over his face. He pulled the angel toward him and stared into his eyes. Then he threaded his hand through his hair and placed a soft kiss on his lips._

_Neither of them closed their eyes, and he saw Cas’ widen. Then the angel kissed back hungrily, pinning Dean against the wall behind them._

_When they broke apart for a second, Dean looped his arms around Cas’ waist. “I love you too.”_

Dean smoothed the clothes carefully, his mind returning to the present. Then he put them in one of his drawers and closed it. 

“Gonna help with research or not? Jack’s already working his way through some books.” Dean turned to find Sam at the doorway. 

He ignored the question, his heart pounding in his throat. “Where did he go?” 

“Cas? I’m sure he’s just somewhere else in the bunker.”

Dean’s voice was tight when he answered. “He’s not. I looked. Where the hell is he Sam?” His voice rose a little with the question and he took a deep breath to steady himself. 

“Hey, man, relax. I’ll bet he’s just out for a beer run. Why are you getting so upset about this? Have you tried calling him?” 

Dean’s gaze drifted to the drawer with Cas’ clothes. In the trenchcoat he’d found Cas’ phone. “He doesn’t have his phone,” he said quietly. 

“How do you know that? Did you try it? He could just be busy.” 

“He doesn’t have it, Sam,” Dean said through gritted teeth. 

Sam held up his hands defensively. “Okay. I’ll, uh, go get Jack I guess and we can look for him.” 

They decided to split up. Jack would walk around the bunker outside, Dean would look through the garage and the lower level again, and Sam would take the main floor. 

When he walked into the garage, another wave of panic hit him. They weren’t going to find Cas. He was gone. For some reason, after what had happened, he’d just left. Dean had done something wrong, had pushed him away. 

With shaky steps, he walked over to Baby, leaning heavily against her. His fingers splayed out over the cool metal of the top, pushing further away from his body as he leaned in further. He could see his breath on the black top for just a moment before it faded completely. He wasn’t sure how long he stayed like that, but he didn’t move until his legs had started to shake slightly from holding him in the position. He pulled off the car and looked up at the ceiling. Then, casting one more glance around the garage, he left. 

When he got to his room, Sam was just leaving it. When he saw Dean, he paused, and something on his face made Dean freeze. Made him want to run back to the garage, where it was safe. 

“I,” Sam cleared his throat and shut Dean’s door behind him. “I found Cas’ phone.” 

Dean fought to keep his face straight. As casually as he could, he asked, “Yeah?”

“I tracked it. Thought we could see where he’d gone. And it was here, so I had it play a noise.”

“Okay?” Dean felt heat rising in his cheeks, but he tried to relax, tried to not sound defensive. 

Sam shifted on his feet and raised his eyebrows, as if waiting for Dean to say more. When he didn’t, he crossed his arms. “Dean, why were his clothes in your room? Why was his phone there? Where is he?” 

“I don’t know where he is, Sammy,” Dean said, trying to stop his voice from shaking. Cas was gone. He’d left. 

“Dean, what did you…” Sam trailed off, his eyes searching Dean’s face. But Dean was slipping away, lost in a memory. 

_Cas’ hands swiftly undid his buttons, his mouth never once leaving Dean’s. He was desperate and fast, but Dean held him back, lifting his chin so their eyes could meet._

_“You sure this is okay, man?”_

_Cas smiled, but it wasn’t a soft smile. It was wolvish, almost devilish. And when he looked back up at Dean, his eyes lit up briefly, pure white landing on Dean’s face. Then he answered, his voice deep and powerful. “Yes.”_

_His hands reached up and Dean’s shirt fell to the floor. Then his mouth was on Dean’s again and all Dean could do was hold on tightly to his waist, breathing heavily into the kiss._

“Dean? You still with me?” Sam’s voice jerked him back to the present and he looked at him with raised eyebrows. 

“What?” 

“I said, what did you do?”

“I don’t know,” Dean said roughly before pushing past Sam into his room. 

Sam stayed at the doorway, concern painted on his face while Dean opened the drawer, pulling out the trenchcoat and holding it to him. 

“He was there when I fell asleep,” he said quietly, his back to his brother. “And when I woke up… He was gone.” He didn’t care what he had implied. Didn’t care that Sam was probably looking at him with those wide puppy dog eyes. Because Cas was gone. “He left,” he finished, his voice breaking slightly. 

“He’ll turn up,” Sam said. But Dean could tell it was half-hearted. He turned around and met his brother’s eyes, no matter how painful it was. 

“I don’t know what I did. I fucked it up, Sammy. I thought- Dammit, I thought we could finally be happy, you know?”

Sam nodded and opened his mouth to reply, but before he could, Jack appeared in the doorway next to him. 

“He didn’t leave, Dean,” Jack said. 

“What?” Dean asked, looking behind Jack for any sign of Cas. 

“I didn’t find him,” Jack said, following his gaze. “But you said you made him happy?”

Dean shifted awkwardly, glancing at Sam. He still didn’t want to talk about this. Whatever he’d done had driven Cas away. Then he cleared his throat and looked at the floor. “Yeah. Well, I thought so. I don’t know.” 

When he looked back up, Jack was staring at him with wide innocent eyes. He tilted his head slightly to the side, then said, “You did. Make him happy, that is.” Then Jack’s face changed and he bit his lip, his eyes going dark. “He’s gone.” 

“What do you mean… gone?” Sam asked. 

“He made a deal,” Jack sighed, “to save me. When he was truly happy the Empty would take him.” 

Dean’s breath caught and he felt anger rise in his chest. “Then why the fuck didn’t he tell us- why didn’t he tell me that before-” he stopped, clenching and unclenching his fists on the trenchcoat he was still holding. 

“He didn’t want to worry you. He said he was at peace with his choice.”

Sam shook his head, pursing his lips. 

But Dean couldn’t see what he did next, couldn’t hear the next words. His vision went red and static replaced any noise. He let the trenchcoat fall from his hands and slammed them into the dresser, pulling it toward him. It toppled to the floor, and he had to back up to avoid getting hit. 

He reached for the lamp on the table next to it and threw it down, watching the glass shatter everywhere.

“Dammit, Cas,” he whispered, his chest heaving and his nails digging sharply into his palms. Then he looked back up at Sam and Jack, who were watching him with wide eyes. 

“I’m getting him back,” he said to them, clenching his jaw. “I don’t fucking care what it takes. I’m getting him back.” 

He shoved them out of the way as he stomped from the room. When he reached the library, he leaned against the wooden table. His eyes found the initials he and Sam had carved into the wood and he grabbed a knife from his belt on impulse. Wiping tears that had started to prickle in his eyes, he haphazardly carved “C. W.” into the table.

“I’m getting you back,” he muttered. “I promise.” 


End file.
